Monday, August 08, 2005

Don't Be A Lobster

A friend of mine recently shared with me about a conversation he had about my soon to be released book: "Some Assembly Required: How to Make, Keep and Grow Your Business Relationships" (New Year Publishing) . The other person mentioned having met me and that we discussed my book on the importance of relationships and networking.

This person felt that the topic of building a professional network of business contacts was "WAY OVER DONE", and that it would be impossible for an unknown author to have any real success with a business book.

My friend shared this with me because we were conversing about how there are always people who are quick to find the negative in every situation, and take delight in cutting others down. I just laughed.

This reminds me of "The Lobster Story", which I heard many years ago (not sure of the source, sorry). Did you know fishermen can store live lobsters in a box with relatively low sides and no lid? This is because any time one lobster tries to crawl out of the pen, others will grab it with a claw and pull it back. After a while, the lobsters stop trying to escape because their peers do not let them get away.

That is how many people behave. They are so threatened by anyone else reaching for the stars, that they work hard to pull them back down to earth.

Did you know that over one hundred publishers turned down the book "Chicken Soup For The Soul" (by Mark Victor Hansen and Jack Canfield). They were told that books of collected stories do not sell very well and would not be marketable. LOBSTERS!! "Chicken Soup" and the books in the series that followed have gone on to be some of the best selling books in history.

I am not comparing my book to the Chicken Soup series (not yet!!!), but the point is that you should not let the naysayers get you down. If you have a goal or a dream, go for it. Luckily for me, I am allergic to lobster.

Have A Great Day.

Thom Singer

1 comment:

Steve Harper said...

Great story and excellent post! In the promotion of my own book I can not tell you how many people have surprised me along the way with their negativity. I have met some really amazing people as well and fortunately those people outnumber the negative nay-sayers 50-1....but the 1's still bother me I have to admit but not for what they think they are doing to me with their comments, but what it means about them as people.

I have recently been doing a whole bunch of research on the motivation for communication. It is interesting to see how negative commentary is really displaced negative feeling that the commentator has about themselves. There is a host of reasons for this, inadequacy, jealousy, greed, most or none of it good and all boiling beneath their surface. The only way they can deal with these feelings of inadequacy is to lash out at someone else and generally the result is commentary such as you describe.

My advice....cream rises to the top and the last time I checked, lobsters were still scum sucking bottom dwellers. Keep em where they belong or findsome with a really HOT pot!