Why We Struggle With Networking

I was recently interviewed by the folks at MBA Highway Blog.  The below appeared on their site on January 18. 2011.
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In this post, we’ll hear from speaker and author, Thom Singer, who is an expert in social networking and personal branding.  After you read this post on our flaws in Networking, make sure to check out his site to gain a lot more insight on how you can become a much better networker.  Thom can be found at www.thomsinger.com.   As an MBA student or graduate, you’ll want to read his book, “Some Assembly Required: A Networking Guide for Graduates.”

Now….a few words from Thom Singer.

First of all, we live and serve the ‘John Wayne Cowboy’ society, which is a culture where everyone believes we have to achieve success alone.  We think success is for loners but this is hardly true.  In reality, it doesn’t matter who you are, from Bill Gates to the president to a person running a successful chain of chicken restaurants, you can’t do everything.   Our society is driven by a mentality that we can’t ask for help, because we believe no one is out there to help us.  Mentally, we start out totally wrong.  There are people who can and will help.  Success comes from long-term and mutually beneficial relationships.

Secondly, networking has gotten a bad name over the years.  Can you believe it?  When people think of networking, they think of ‘takers.’  We think that people only show up when they have a need.  For example, “I just got laid off and I better go network because I need a job.”  Another common example is with Sales people.  When they are not making their quotas, they will call everyone in their network to ask them to make referrals for them.  They don’t keep in touch the rest of the time..  On the flip side of this argument is that networking is always happening. It’s a give and take.  It’s not something you just do when you need something because people see right through that really quick.  So you have to be constantly engaged and be willing to help and serve other people.  Don’t keep score. But that’s not the way many people think of networking.

Another problem with networking is the definition.  If I ask ten people to give me a definition of networking, I’d probably get 7 or 8 different definitions.  The definition I like to use is “the creation of long term and mutually beneficial relationships between two or more where everyone involved succeeds more because of the relationship than they would without the relationship.”  The key is that it is mutually beneficial and everyone is successful.   People too often overlook this aspect of networking, and fear they might just look needy or like a taker.  But if you’re doing it right, you won’t because you’ll be giving far more than you are getting.  That never looks bad.

The final reason we struggle with networking is that we often witness many successful people who have law degrees, MBAs and engineering degrees and who are mostly left-brained.  They are thoughtful, study hard and do research.  They never would be confused as the social butterflies of their world.  They are self-identified as introverted.  They think it is hard to go out and talk to people, so they do not place a priority on the activity.  The surprising reality here is that introverts are better networkers.  If we go back to the other examples I mentioned when all you’re doing is talking about yourself, no one is going to like it.  No one likes a braggart.  Unlike the extroverts, Introverts ask questions and listen intensely to what others are saying.  Extroverts can sometimes be focused on what they are going to say next while the other person is talking, missing the entire message.  When you are listening to the other person, you are more likely to see where you can make the connection to help them. Most introverts tell me after they get to know someone they are more comfortable in talking about themselves.  If an introvert goes in and asks a lot of questions, then they’ll learn something about that person.  Knowing a little about someone breeds familiarity and so the introvert becomes more comfortable in sharing things freely.

Networking is your key to career success.  Do it incorrectly and you go nowhere.  Become proficient at it and you’ll fill your life with opportunity.

Thanks, Thom.  We appreciate the time you’ve spent with us.  You can find out more about Thom, his books, articles, speaking events and blogs at www.thomsinger.com.

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Guest Expert:

Todd Rhoad, MSEE, MBA is Director at BT Consulting, a career consulting firm in Altanta, and author of “Blitz The Ladder” and the soon to be released “MBA Owner’s Manual.” Todd can be reached at todd.rhoad@blitzteamconsulting.com.

Anger Eats Your Lunch

My effort on the new year goal of trying to be "better" has lead me to notice anger.  My kid is working on an assignment that involves Biblical Literature and in reading the stories I see there has always been anger for thousands of years.  It rarely leads to anything good.

I don't usually have a temper, but I do get mad.  Mad at others.  Mad at myself.  What is interesting is that when I get mad at myself I have all the facts.  However, when I am mad at others I can never know everything.  Anytime we deal with other people there is a human on the other side who has their own stuff.  Since we cannot do more than assume their back story, we fill in the blanks with our own ideas of what is going on.  Usually these assumptions are skewed from reality and darken our lives (not theirs).

Experience has shown that relationships can trump nearly all adversarial situations when those involved want to find a solution.  But anger and resentment feed the limitations and cuts off the path to mutually beneficial relationships.  

To advise simple forgiveness of others is too Pollyanna. It is difficult to grant, and even harder to get accepted (or to accept from others).  I just try to be aware, and not let anger eat my lunch.

When dealing with people there is never a dull moment, but the path to comfort as a person is one that is riddled with insecurities, fears, wonders.  With time those are pushed aside by the realities of comfort with self.  

Have A Great Day

thom singer

"Flash Culture" - How To Create A Mini-Society At Your Conference

When it is done right a conference becomes a "mini-society" that extends far beyond the physical event.  The people who come together for an industry meeting, a users conference, or an association annual convention share a variety of experiences that bond them together.  Humans are experiential beings, and it is through these mutually occurring encounters that we go beyond the surface exchange of pleasantries and build relationships.

"Flash Mobs" have become all the rage the last several years.  Most have seen the planned take overs of shopping mall food courts by singing and dancing groups that surprise and captivate an audience.  I have attended several conferences that have even had "flash mob" performances in their ballroom gatherings.  But creating a "flash culture" goes beyond a single performance.  A culture is more than just something to witness, but is instead a series of patterns and learned behaviors that impact everyone involved.  

In the greater society culture can be takes shape overall or in smaller sub-sets over an extended period of time.  Rarely is a legitimate culture manufactured, but it can be guided by the adherence to or breaking of accepted rules of behavior.  At a two or three day event there is limited time, and if left to chance it can be hard to allow any cultural norms to materialize.  However, if forced onto the participants, there can also be a resistance.

To create a culture at an event there must be a dialogue that exists before, during and after the conference. In my role as "The Conference Catalyst" I tackle one aspect of the "mini-society" which is the desire for attendees to network.  Across industry lines a main reason stated for attending conferences, trade shows, seminars and other meetings is for the "networking opportunities", yet once they arrive..... most people stink at making the type of connections they desire.

While networking is only one facet of the greater culture, it can spur the speed at which the other threads of the whole experience are spread.  Once people are engaged with each other they will peel back the layers of the onion and hold deeper and more meaningful conversations about the learning, trends, and best practices. Getting people excited about one another can ignite the whole experience.

When the presentations, both keynotes and breakout sessions, at an event are the right mix of information and inspiration you will find it effecting the language spoken in the hallways.  The right speakers have the ability to set the tone for the whole meeting.  While a giant emphasis is put on the quality of the information (which is important), someone who is brilliant without speaking skills can murder the mood.  This is why the selection of speakers is paramount to the success of an event.  A series of average presentations will leave hole in the energy level of the group.  Just because someone is smart or has done something cool is not reason enough to put them on stage.  

An additional consideration is about how active the presenters are with the members of the society.  Do they arrive and leave directly around their time to speak?  Most participants enjoy talking with the speakers, or at least like it when they see them actively engaged in the meeting festivities.  There is often a disconnect between the presenters and the audience, which can cause a feeling that there are different levels of importance in a society.  As part of the vetting process organizers should talking with speakers in advance about how they will participate in the conference (if not for the whole time, at least the day of their program). 

The venue also leaves an impression on the whole culture.  From the enthusiasm of the staff to the decor of the facility (and the decorations) there is an aesthetic impact on the mood.  The size and the layout of the main room, and the other common areas, will encourage or discourage human to human interactions.  The music and lighting also can also raise or lower the excitement of each person.  The quality of the coffee, snacks, and meals also matter. 

Vendors and sponsors can often feel like outsiders at many large events and their disengagement is felt by everyone.  While they pay large sums of money to exhibit, some limit their own access to the overall conference.  Vendors should have their whole team attend all "main stage" presentations, as it is that shared experience that will make them an equal part of the "mini-society".  Too often they utilize this time to make calls, sleep in, or otherwise occupy their time.  However, when they are in the same room participating with all attendees it creates much better conversations when attendees come to their booths.  "What did you think of that speaker today?" is a more engaging question than "how is the show going for you?".

Vendors need to be educated not to pounce on attendees with hard pitches or hard sell tactics.  Nobody comes to a conference to be cornered by sales people.  They do come to meet and have conversations with interesting people.  Those who listen and learn find better conversations while present and more access once the event is over.

There are many intangible actions that take place in creating a culture, and therefore event organizers must put into place online and offline opportunities for the society to continue after everyone returns home.  Getting people to participate is difficult if they did not feel the inspiration while at the conference.  Online groups and communities with ongoing discussions and education must be a year round project, and must provide legitimate value.  Just having a LinkedIn Group, a Facebook Page, or a couple of YouTube videos is not the cultivation of community.  There must be a series of people assigned to leading these efforts.  Nobody can force something to go viral, but if your event is an "Industry Happening", then both those who were there live, and those who were not, will want to continue their participation.

Time is limited to create a "Flash Culture", but when it happens.... everyone knows it.

Have A Great Day.

thom singer

Thom Singer is known as "The Conference Catalyst". He works with meeting planners and conference organizers to set the tone for a meeting. His presentations educate, inspire and motivate attendees to engage deeper in the event and make meaningful connections.  http://www.conferencecatalyst.com 

www.ConferenceCatalyst.com

Want To Maximize The ROI When Attending A Conference? - New Book Will Help

The ABC's of Conferences

Maximizing your attendance at a conference, trade show, convention or other business gathering can be as easy as A-B-C.

The little things you do make a big difference in getting the most out of your participation at a conference. Advance planning , having plenty of business cards and being a catalyst for connections are just the start. Whether you are an attendee, a sponsor, or a presenter at business events, this book will cause you to
reflect on how you get the most from your investment in attending conferences.

In this book you will learn that:

• Introverts are better networkers
• Asking intelligent questions gets you noticed
• Social Media is not a fad

As part of the New Year Publishing “Airplane Book Series,” The ABC’s of Conferences is designed to be read in a coffee shop or on an airplane. Share this book with your co-workers and business associates to inspire everyone to have more engaging experiences at any conference they attend.

Available at Amazon.com (Coming soon to print and available now on Kindle).  Contact New Year Publishing for bulk orders for conference attendees.

Have A Great Day

thom singer

A Great Experience at the PCMA "Convening Leaders" Conference

The Professional Convention Management Association (PCMA) hosted their annual "Convening Leaders" conference in San Diego.  I had the honor of being the "Conference Catalyst" in their Learning Lounge and to present in several forums.

The Learning Lounge is a new format that PCMA has pioneered over the last two years.  This program was organized and orchestrated by the highly creative and cutting edge consulting firm, Velvet Chainsaw.  Dave Lutz and Jeff Hurt (and now joined by Donna Kastner) are business improvement consultants who specialize in serving associations and corporations in  transforming their meetings into industry happenings.  The Learning Lounge became a conference within a conference, offering unique and bite-sized presentations and hosted discussions by a variety of speakers which allowed people to customize their learning needs.  Those who participated in this series of sessions all raved about the format.  It was the place to learn, connect and contemplate.

I presented four times in the lounge, including opening and closing presentations on how PCMA attendees could maximize their ROI at the Convening Leaders Conference and twice on how to create a networking culture in the planning of any event.

Several of those in attendance walked around the different learning "pods" in the Learning Lounge and brainstormed ideas on how to bring this format into their own conferences. (The National Speakers Association will be integrating a Learning Lounge at it's conference this summer, and I will be hosting and helping organize their program!).  I expect that many meetings will add in this alternative option into their agendas.

A highlight of the week for me was being the keynote speaker for the "Student Union" program.  I facilitated a conversation with the nearly 300 college students who were in attendance.  These are mostly hospitality majors from the country's leading colleges that are teaching the future leaders in the convention and meetings industry.  Spending time with these ambitious young professionals made me feel confident about the future!

Four of my books were also sold in the convention bookstore and I participated in a book signing which allowed me to meet even more cool people.

Having attended thousands of meetings, conferences and other gatherings throughout my lifetime, I was blown away by the chance to participate in this PCMA event.  From the high energy atmosphere, to the top level education, to the phenomenal social events (an opening gala, a party for charity on the US Midway, and a block party like, with Kool and the Gang, that rivaled any music festival) --- this was truly a "Happening".

Have A Great Day.

thom singer

 Thom Singer is known as "The Conference Catalyst". He works with meeting planners and conference organizers to set the tone for a meeting. His presentations educate, inspire and motivate attendees to engage deeper in the event and make meaningful connections.  http://www.conferencecatalyst.com 

www.ConferenceCatalyst.com

Guest Blogger - Brian Trivitt - Networking and Exercise

Today's Guest Blogger is my friend Brian Trivitt.

Networking and Exercise

By Brian Trivitt

There are many things in this world that are tough, yet necessary to do. At the same time, it seems like many conversations you have with people sooner or later end up dealing with the subject of how to make things easier in general. The fact is, there are a lot of things you can hire somebody to do for you.  However, there are also some  things that are not only necessary to do if you want to improve your own life;  but more importantly, can only be done by you, regardless of how much fame and fortune you currently may have.

I consistently like to work out to stay in shape and be healthy. After being laid off from a Fortune 50 Company a few months back, I am also making a strong effort to build a network with a wide array of people. So why am I bringing up exercising and networking in the same sentence? Because they are two of the best examples of activities nobody else can do for you.

Not only are tasks that can only be done by you often very beneficial to your own life, but they also separate the true hard workers in this world from the ones who merely claim to work hard.  Can you imagine if one of your New Year's resolutions you told you co-workers that you were paying the kid down the street to go hit the treadmill three times a week for you?

In networking, being present and actually making an effort to converse with people on a consistent basis are critical to building a successful network. Sending somebody else to network for you not only does little to nothing to build your network, but after while, I believe the argument could be made that it actually ends up hurting your efforts more than not networking at all. The reason for this is that successful networking requires that somebody consistently show they are truly interested in getting to know an individual or a group of people. Of course, the only way to do this is for you to be in the presence of the other party and make a genuine effort to get to know them. Beyond that, you must also follow up with an individual to continue to foster the relationship (insert joke here where the rich and powerful CEO has his secretary call the average guy he met the other night to see how he is doing!)

I think most everybody would agree that one of the best feelings in the world is working hard and taking a moment to say to yourself, “this isn’t easy, but the results make it all worthwhile.” So, while you may not make the cover of the latest fitness magazine or become the next networking guru, exercise and networking actually have something very important in common--EVERYBODY has the ability to improve upon their fitness level and their networking skills!

Since everybody has the ability to improve upon some things themselves, I highly recommend examining the things you need to do to improve your own life, and make the effort to do them yourself. Don’t get me wrong, there will always be those tasks that it’s better to have somebody else do them for you (if you are as bad and dislike house cleaning as much as I do, you can do what I did, which is marry a lady who owns a maid service). But besides working on building your network and improving your health, find something that you enjoy making an effort consistently to do on your own.     

Brian Trivitt, MBA, specializes in Enterprise Customer Service and IT Project Management. He holds an undergraduate in Computer Information Systems from Missouri State University and an MBA from Texas State University. Mr. Trivitt is an avid homebrewer who has a passion for brewing as well as analyzing and discussing the beer industry. You can follow him on his blog at trivittbrew.com.

Let It Go And Forgive

My blog posts here and here about "being a better person in the new year" sparked a couple of interesting conversations. I had a deep philosophical conversation with an acquaintance about what is "better" and did I mean "better than others"? (Ummm, no.  I meant better than my own self in thoughts and actions).  My whole purpose of utilizing "better" as a my goal word for 2012 is to spur myself forward.

I think each of us can improve in all the area of our lives.  We live in a crazy and busy world where the issue in front of us often can seem like the most important thing in the world.  People get caught up in their own stuff and allow frustration, anger, jealousy, competition, doubt, fear and a cornucopia of other emotions to take center stage.

Another conversation with a stranger in a Starbucks lead to the advise of stepping back and releasing your knee jerk reactions when in conflict (yes, I do talk to all kinds of people in random places).  He said, "To be a better person you have to learn to let go and forgive.  You never know what is happening in the other person's world, so it is best to not take their actions or words personally and forgive them for their stumbles". (No, my conversation partner was not a mystical monk, but his wise words have lingered in my mind).

It is good advice, but not as easy to put into practice.  Too often people are convinced that others are out to screw them over (which may or may not be true, but I have found that words and actions are not usually as targeted as one might think).   Taking a step back and remembering that when dealing with people we all come to the table with our own "stuff" allows us to find peace faster.

The Beatles said it best......"Let it Be".

Have A Great Day.

thom singer

Plan For Success When Attending A Conference

Attending a conference should be educational, inspirational and fun.  Conventions, trade shows and other gatherings are amazing opportunities to mingle with your industry peers, hear about best practices, learn about the latest trends, listen to amazing speakers, create networking connections, and re-charge your batteries.  If you do it right, a multi-day conference will be motivational and exhausting (in a good way!).

Both extroverts and introverts benefit from attending business / industry meetings, but they must plan their time differently.  Those who gain their energy from being around people will find plenty of opportunity to socialize and connect, while those who need some down-time to fully process the experience must plan ahead to ensure they are not overwhelmed by a non-stop agenda. Neither extroverts or introverts are "right" or "better" in how they tackle their participation, but they must be true to their nature if they want to make sure they maximize the ROI from their investment of time and money.

Here are 8 ways to maximize your time at a conference:

1.  Plan ahead.  Before you arrive at a conference have a plan for what you want to accomplish while at the event.  Determine whom you want to meet and which breakout sessions you will be attending.  Be clear about your purpose so that you will not miss out on the important opportunities.  If you know you will need some time to rest, regroup, make calls, etc... figure out in advance where in the schedule this will be best accomplished.

2.  Know yourself.  If you are not one who loves the big happy hours, then know that you will have to work harder in the party situations.  Too often introverts will slip away from the social aspects of a conference, but this means they will miss out on the chance to make, grow, and expand your business relationships. Take a deep breath and dive in.  Find a "networking buddy" who also feels more shy and work together.  Set a goal of connecting with three to five people you have never met before.

On the flip side, if you are all about the social side you might find yourself skipping the educational sessions or tuning out the speaker while surfing Facebook.  The education at a conference is useful and can spur you to more career success if you are paying attention for the nuggets of inspiration.  Commit to putting your phone in your pocket or purse for the first half of each presentation.  If the speaker does not earn the right to your attention, then you can turn to your emails or walk out of the room (it is okay to vote with your feet if the speaker is dull, you are not in prison).

3. Bring a lot of business cards.  While we live in an age of "just Google me", or "find me on Facebook", the reality is that a business card is still a useful tool.  Telling someone to find you online is asking them to do all the work.  It is selfish to think other people have the time to hunt you down later (especially if you have a common name), and the truth is most people wont seek you out.  Some people claim this is a good thing, as they do not want people following up with them, but that is a limiting point of view.  All opportunities come from people and you can not pre-judge who at a conference might be that one person who might be a mutually beneficial connection in the future.  Having about the business card is about the other person, not about you!

Additionally, a business card is a great tool to help you get out of a conversation.  Exchanging cards is an acceptable end to a discussion at a networking event.  If you do not have a card to offer up, you might be standing there talking to someone for a long, long time as you look for a polite way to move on.

4.  Focus on meeting other attendees.  Many people ignore the others in the audience, while instead lining up to meet the speakers (or hanging around exclusively with co-workers and other friends).  I have watched people stand in 45 minute long lines to shake a speaker's hand without ever uttering a word to the person in front of behind them.  A speaker who has several hundred people in the crowd will most likely not remember you later, while the person next to you could become a life-long friend and colleague.  Take the time to meet someone new on every break, in each breakout session, and at all meals.

5.  Do not be part of a clique.  Industry meetings are often giant "family reunions" for those who have participated for many years.  While it is wonderful to see old friends, do not limit your attention to those you have seen in past years.  Try to include new people and first time attendees in all conversations you have in the networking areas.  If you want to have a private talk with someone you already know, set up a time and go away from the convention area (even by only a few yards).  Having closed conversations in the common areas sends a message to others that you are not open to knowing them.  When standing in a "conversation cluster" (the circle of people who are chatting), leave an opening that would allow another person to join the discussion.  Seek ways to introduce people to each other and everyone will benefit.

6.  Plan for follow up.  Meeting someone one time does not make them part of your network.  Meeting them once makes them "someone you have met once" -- and there is a big difference between a one-time chat and a person with whom you have established an ongoing and mutually beneficial relationship.  You will not have a reason to follow up with everyone you encounter, but you must be looking for ways to re-connect with those who stand out.  Be sure to get their contact information so that you can call, email or send a handwritten note shortly after you return home from the conference.  Assuming they will remember you later without your efforts for follow up will most likely lead to nothing.

There are also many ways in social media that you can continue the conversation, but since many people use Facebook, LinkedIn, Twitter, and other online tools differently, make sure that you are aware of the how the others choose to connect in these forums.  I do not see value in linking with those I have not really established a meaningful connection, so I have created the "Coffee, Meal or Beer Rule" for LinkedIn and Facebook connections (Twitter is different because if does not require an acceptance to follow someone).  My belief is too many strangers in your contact list turns social media into the White Pages.  A casual chat and a business card exchange is often not enough for some people to link, while others are happy to connect with anyone out there.  Neither is "right", so you must be respectful of the other person's way of utilizing social media.  Ask them how they choose to use these tools!

7.  Write a recap.  While you were away at the conference many of your co-workers were still at work.  Often they imagine that you are off having a great time at a fancy resort while they are picking up the slack at the office.  Upon your return, write a short recap of what you learned, who you met, and the industry best-practices you discovered.  When you distribute this to others they will understand that your purpose for being at the conference was about the greater good of the whole group, not just a vacation for you on company time.  There will also be things you share that can inspire creativity in your co-workers from which your whole team could benefit.

8.  Have fun.  While busy and tiring, attending a multi-day event and meeting people should be a lot of fun.  Sometimes in our fast-paced world we must remember to find the joy all around us.  Humans are experiential beings and you must allow yourself to be part of the min-society that is created at a conference.  When you are open to the fun side of the conference it will always find you!

Enjoy the conference!

Have A Great Day!!

thom singer

Thom Singer is known as "The Conference Catalyst". He works with meeting planners and conference organizers to set the tone for a meeting. His presentations educate, inspire and motivate attendees to engage deeper in the event and make meaningful connections. http://www.conferencecatalyst.com 

Resilience and the Entrepreneur

An entrepreneur will be tested.  Along the way he or she will be pushed and prodded.  They will fall down.  There will be days when they will question their resolve.  At times they will wonder if all the sacrifices are worth the long hours and constant pressure.  It is not a matter of if an entrepreneur will face tough times, but when.

This is where resilience comes into play.  Those who will succeed must have the ability to return to their original excitement and dedication of growing their business after facing down a plethora of adversity.

Resiliency does not happen by accident. The individual has to make the choice in advance to be prepared to bounce back no matter how they are bent and stretched.  Being in charge, dealing with employee issues, measuring client satisfaction, winning investors, burn rates, government regulations, and countless other responsibilities can push anyone to the breaking point.

Stress can be a strong opponent, especially for a first time entrepreneur who is not prepared to cope and adapt to ever changing situations.  Experienced professionals have the advantage of having seen their previous companies survive and thrive after a variety of traumas.

Without experience the entrepreneur must counter with a long-term vision, a strong belief in self, emotional control, and external social support.

Long-term vision:  Knowing deep inside that your commitment to the venture is bigger than any short-term set back will help you look past a current situation.  Being aware of the goal will make it easier to navigate yourself toward a solution to the problem.  There are always options when you are clear on the destination.

Belief in self:  Doubt can quickly undermine anyone.  Successful entrepreneurs are sure in their soul that they can and will find success in growing their business.  This confidence will get you out of bed in the morning on those days when you want to pull the covers over your head.

Control of emotions:  When we deal with other people there are often emotions involved.  When we allow negative feelings to take over we can make poor choices.  Hurt feelings, jealousy, embarrassment, disappointment, anger, fear, guilt, and other emotional responses can cloud judgement and lead to poor decisions.

External social support:  When facing difficulties we can discover resolve in the experiences of others.  Having a network of other business professionals who you can turn to will always be a great resource for an entrepreneur.  A formal or informal group of advisers whom you respect and trust can guide you through the muddy waters.  However, you cannot wait until you are in trouble to build the relationships needed.  You need your support network in place long before you face the big problems.

Resilience is important.  You will get knocked around and down, but you must be being able to get up and be stronger than before.  Rising up and moving forward is the only option for the successful entrepreneur.

Have A Great Day.

thom singer

7 Predictions for the Meetings Industry in 2012

This post originally appeared on the TSNN blog on December 27, 2011.

December and January spark articles and blog posts about filled with predictions for the new year.  While I cannot really know what will happen in the world, I do have some observations about meetings and conferences from my time spent as a keynote and breakout speaker at over 300 events (59 presentations in 2011).

Meeting Industry Predictions for 2012
By Thom Singer

1.  The meetings business will continue to recover from the hits it took in the recession. I am bullish on the state of face-to-face gatherings, and believe that neither an ongoing bad economy nor the virtual options that exist to deliver content can replace the need for humans to gather.  The hard working meeting organizers will still have to do more with less, but they will put on some amazing shows.

2.   Networking opportunities will continue to be a main reason people attend meetings, but many conferences will always come up short on creating an environment where people can get past their trepidation about going beyond idle chit-chat, putting down their smart-phones, and get to meaningful conversations.  Creating a networking culture will be a topic that will become more important to meeting planners.

3.  Social media will still be a hot topic, as it has been for the last three years.  The number of break-out sessions on topics about how-to use Twitter, Facebook, LinkedIn, etc... will continue be prevalent on agendas.  Both the meeting organizers and those who attend will keep looking to social media as a way to build community.

4.  More people will be calling themselves "speakers" in 2012 than ever before.  Internet consultant Simon Salt recently said that "Speaking is the new blogging".  A few years ago it was popular to identify oneself as a "blogger", and now there seems to be a movement for people to add "Conference Speaker" to their bios.  The problem is that not everyone has the presentation experience that the audience desires and deserves, and a poor presentation can hurt the experience for everyone.  This trend will cause more confusion and work for meeting organizers when vetting the speakers for their events.

5.  Short presentations.  I have experienced a trend where organizers are only seeking 15 to 20 minutes talks from speakers (for both paid and non-paid speakers).  The success of TED and TEDx has put an emphasis on a meeting having more people sharing short bursts of captivating ideas.  This trend will continue to gain traction in 2012.

6.  People at conferences will vote with their feet.  If an audience does not resonate with the speaker, it will become more common for them to stand up and walk out during a presentation.  This trend of "voting with your feet" has become socially acceptable at technology focused events (such as SXSW Interactive) over the past few years, but will expand to more meetings in the future.

7.  Pre-event communities online will continue to gain popularity.  Event organizers are putting more attention into expanding the event community before and after the event by creating online communities.  While some events will struggle getting their attendees to connect beyond their physical gathering, others will find the secret sauce to engagement.

8.  Events that deliver a little more than expected will flourish. Doing what is expected is the minimum.  Going farther will make people smile and have a better memory of the experience.

Have a great 2012.

Thom Singer

What Message In A Shortcut?

I have been asked a lot about sending cards and thank you notes via online services that print the card and mail it out via the US Postal Service.

Those sending cards via these shortcuts get very excited that they are sending a personal touch in the physical world, but is it equal to a handwritten note?

Using a "short cut" is better than not sending a card.  However, the person getting the card knows when you hand wrote it yourself or used a service (even if it looks like hand writing).  Therefore, it is not equal.

I suggest we all think about the message we send when we do things part way:

 "Thank you, but not thank you enough for me to take the time to write this myself". 

Sending an email as a "thank you".... it is a good thing, but not as powerful as the real handwritten note.  I am NOT saying it is bad.... but people know the difference. The same is true of these online or mobile phone services. Too few people say "thank you" at all... so a service is a good option if you will never hand write the note..... but I say you should pen the note by hand.

What do you think?

Have A Great Day!

thom singer

Review Of My 2011 "Theme" -- And Being A Better Person in 2012

On January 1, 2011 I wrote on this blog about my theme for the year.

This theme was a variation on my annual goal setting and included:

• Belief in Self
• Intention in Action
• Joy in Family and Friends
• Fun in Success

This year was a good year.  While I still have a long way to go to reach my desired levels of success, I did work hard to achieve my own levels of attention to confidence, intention, family/friends and fun.  I achieved more in 2011 than I did in 2010, and I feel better about my prospects for the future.

I could not have done it alone, as I am fortunate to have a lot of people who love me and support my efforts.

As I look to 2012 I have been perplexed about setting my goals and establishing a theme.  While I have come a long way in my career and my personal endeavors, I still fall short in some areas in which I want to improve.

Several weeks ago I wrote a post called "Being A Better Person in 2012".  The blog entry was written quickly and without much thought as to what it meant.  The interesting part is how many people commented to me off line about this post.  Some said nice things about my already being good, while others jumped right in to help me identify my flaws.  Others shared my broad desire to be a better person and inquired about how we could support each other in such efforts.

I googled the words "being a better person" and discovered that much is already written on the topic.  There seems to be a big interest from people in this idealistic thought of self-improvement.

The debate raged in my mind for over a week, wondering if it was too vague a statement ("Being A Better Person") to be my theme for 2012. There is little I can do to measure the results, and it is hardly a topic that can be discussed at cocktail parties ("Hi, I am Thom and I am striving to be better than I was yesterday").

Alas, I have decided to try.  I know many of my own areas that need improvement, and there never seems to be a shortage of people who will talk about the flaws of others (behind their back or to their face.... and FYI... talking behind someones back always has a way of getting to the ears of the person being discussed!).... so I know I will have things to add to my list of stuff to do better.

Have A Great Day

thom singer

Hoping "Respect" Makes A Comeback in 2012

"Respect" seems to be on vacation.  The time has come to revitalize the concept of respect in our greater world society.

If you think about terms that have have been tied to respect, the list is endless:  Respect for others, respect for self, respect for elected officials, respect for elders, respect for the choices of others, respect for ideas, respect for traditions, respect for authority, respect for cultural diversity, respect for the dead, respect for parents, respect for humanity, respect for the individual, respect for nature, respect for others, respect for religion, respect for soldiers, respect for your spouse, respect for teachers, respect for time, etc....  But we rarely seem to see respect in action.

However, this is a two way street, as my friend Terry Sisco said in 1987 as a 20-year-old college student: "one does not command respect, you earn respect".  His words have rung in my head for nearly 25 years.

Thus, we all need to be open to being respectful and to doing things that can be respected.

I hope "respect" makes a comeback in 2012.

Have A Great Day.

thom

Intellectual Conversations and Challenging Thoughts at "The Salon"

My friend Zach hosted a gathering called a "Salon".  The idea dates back to the 16th Century and there meet-ups were popular in European society during the post Renaissance.  The meetings were places to exchange ideas, increase knowledge, and expand understanding through conversation.

Zach convened a small group of people to a conference room at his apartment complex and invited the participants to share philosophies of success and happiness.  I was curious about how the "Salon", a term I had only recently heard from another friend who has been involved in similar intimate intellectual conversation groups.  As I reviewed the guest list I realized I was older than the young Millennial crowd, and wondered if my much older Gen X perspectives of the world would be welcomed or understood in the dialogue.

I decided to attend this "Salon" because I have a personal commitment to support unique events hosted by my friends, or meetings where I know the speakers or my peers are being honored.  Too often in our crazy-busy world we choose not to be present when we cannot predetermine the personal ROI.  There is too much focus on "protecting our time" and not enough openness to the serendipity that is part of the human experience.

The "Salon" turned out to be a rewarding and challenging experience.  We were joined by a woman who lived in the apartment complex who was curious about the group, asked to join the discussion, and at times took over the conversation.  While not invited, unfocused, maybe medicated, and clearly a "Wild Card" tossed into the mix, the realities of the new comer's different situations and emotional observations created a fascinating study in how humans engage with each other when peeling back the onion on topics that are often not explored in social interactions.

We went from skimming the surface of success and happiness to a thoughtful and intellectual conversation that included joy, creativity, inspiration, relationships, marriage, children (I was the only parent in the room), freedom, satisfaction, control, fulfillment, contentment, service, suffering, nature, poets, religion, anticipation, philosophy, and technology.

My take away was that we need to strip away the layer of chit chat that prevails in most social situations and allow our thinking minds to ponder topics with other people who are seeking answers.  The success was in the level of respect that was put forth, even when parts of the conversation became uncomfortable or intimately personal.  I felt good at the end of three hours, although challenged on ways that I (and others) view and review our surroundings.

The group will meet again, and I will be there.

Have A Great Day.

thom singer

College Student Seeks PR Job - And Goes Beyond The Normal Path To Get Noticed

This Facebook Ad caught my eye.  I rarely pay attention to the advertisements on the right side of the page, but I had to click to learn more as I am always impressed by people who try unique approaches to acquire what they desire.  In this case it is a college senior, Samuel Solomon, from Auburn University and his desire to find a PR job with a Start-Up.

Innovative Job Seeker

samuelrsolomon.com

I'm Sam. I am looking for a job with a startup. Can you help? Click to see what I have to offer.

Sam seems like a good find for a start up.  His resume shows he has been doing, not just learning, while in college.  He created his own company while in school, has met with seasoned entrepreneurs, and has a clear understanding that the world is full of noise and distractions... and he is seeking ways to stand out (and will help his employer stand out,too!)

When I clicked on his link he had the following statement:

Chances are you will not finish reading this page. It is completely understandable. There are so many distractions available it makes it difficult to get a clear message across. 

So, how do you deliver a message in a world full of distractions? That is where I come in. 

My name is Sam. A public relations major at Auburn University, I created a startup, FRUGGL, and several other web-based projects in my free time. I have a strong background in product testing and digital marketing. Alternatively, I study the parallels between education and entrepreneurship.

His personal website and blog also shows he is a go-getter.... and while I am not seeking to hire a PR person (or anyone for that matter), I wished New Year Publishing or my solo speaking / training business were bigger.... as I would create a job for someone like this guy.

I imagine he will have a job soon!  Good luck, Sam.

Have A Great Day.

thom singer

Being A Better Person in 2012

The idea of a new year -- a fresh start -- always appeals to me.  I have been an avid goal setter for many years.  Some years have been successful, while others have come up short.  Even when I fail to reach my targets, I still believe I have learned and grown.

In 2012 I want to be a better person.  A better husband, father, brother, uncle, brother-in-law, son, friend, vendor, teacher, customer, neighbor, writer, speaker, listener, citizen, etc....

This is a very vague desire and each of those things are hard to quantify.  I do not feel I am awful in these areas, but I often teach others that if you are not moving forward you might be slipping behind.  Stagnant is never good.

We humans are quick to be critical of others, but slow to examine our own short comings.  I do not like to face my demons (we all have them), but I am going to do that in 2012.  There will be no pie charts or graphs to know if I am succeeding, but I will be trying every single day.

Who else wants to play the "be a better person game"?..... Let's talk.

Have A Great Day.

thom singer

Irene Williams, CEO of 21st Century Technologies, at ACG in Austin

Irene Williams, CEO of 21st Century Technologies, was the speaker at the December 2011 ACG Luncheon in Austin.  Drawing on over twenty years experience in leadership positions she has helped her company grow 50% in revenues each year since 2007 and continues to create new strategies for the future.

Her presentation to the Association for Corporate Growth was not a typical "CEO Talk" that one might expect at a business luncheon.  Too often executives deliver canned investor pitches about their company or ego oriented "how to be like me" pontifications.  Instead Ms. Williams shared a series of personal stories, that weaved together her insights about success, in a personal manner that few CEO's can deliver.

Her list included three simple, yet meaningful steps that can help everyone in their life's journey:

1.  Define success in a ways that makes it personal and have a time frame for getting to your goal (know what you want and when you intend to have it).

2.  Hire "superstars" and delegate (too often leaders feel the need to do it all, but when you have the right people they can take care of the details).

3.  Never underestimate the power of consistent and committed passion and energy (find your passion and tap into it full throttle).

Her enthusiasm and total enjoyment for her career were evident in they way she spoke and responded to the questions from the audience.  While she has an impressive resume, she did not have a specific background in the world of intelligence, analytics, security, or data mining.  Instead she has an unparalleled work ethic and a desire for corporate growth and success.  Her tenacity, not her schooling in her industry, has been the spark that is leading the company.

Williams added a few points during the Q&A:

*A good leader can recover fast from the hard knocks that come with running a business.  When you lose a deal, an employee or have another setback, get up fast.... and respond to the needs of your team.

*The most important gift you can give to another person is your time, but you must be careful about managing your calendar, because as your company grows it is impossible to have regular one-on-one meetings with every employee.

*Hire a great marketing team early.  The more complicated the sales the more important marketing is to your company's success.

*If a leader is passionate about their work, they must schedule time for "balance".  Balance makes you a better executive, parent and person.  When you are well rounded you will make better decisions for the company.

The Central Texas Chapter of the Association for Corporate Growth continues to host the best educational and networking events for growth oriented middle market professionals

Have A Great Day

thom singer

(Disclaimer:  My wife, Sara, is the chapter administrator for ACG in Austin and San Antonio).

There Is No Overtime for Entrepreneurs

When you run the business there is no overtime, there is only all-the-time.

The number of hours that entrepreneurs put into launching and growing their ventures can be daunting.  When the buck stops at your desk you are responsible for every little detail, and if your business is growing then the number of issues that you will need to address can appear overwhelming from the outside.  Product and service issues, accounting, legal, HR, sales, marketing, facilities, customer service, IT, vendor relations, and all the other functions of running the business ultimately land on your desk and need attention.

Ignoring any problem and wishing it will go away will cause it to fester into a bigger concern.  Delegating can also be a problem in the early stages, as until you have experienced leaders on your team there might not be anyone whom can take the ultimate responsibility for the decisions. Entrepreneurs must be decisive and action oriented or they will get caught in the loop of ever shrinking amounts of time and a never ending to-do list.

Those who are committed to guiding their dream are rarely are burdened by the amount of work that goes into their company.  When creating the long-term and sustainable entity is fused into your core, the hours do not seem like work.  Those who bore of the monotonous parts of the business may be flirting with failure.  The intimate pieces of being entrepreneurial must be of your soul to keep pushing you forward when times get tough.

It is common for entrepreneurs to get frustrated or angry with the tedious parts of running the company.  The reality is that when you are emotionally engaged in anything it can cause volatility at times.  There are many famous examples of great leaders of industry who have outrageous tempers and outbursts.  Being all encompassed in a cause will make it hard to see the rest of your world in perspective.  Keeping a balance is something you must do with intention.

Be prepared that there will be days when you question why there is nobody else around you who can solve a problem or lighten your load. Know that growing a business can be very lonely, even when you have close friends, a supportive family, and dedicated employees. Strive to make early hires who are entrepreneurial and are willing and excited to roll up their sleeves and work long hours.  Too many people are watching the clock and questioning their personal time commitment, and this will dumbfound an entrepreneur.

Surround yourself with peers who are also entrepreneurs.  There are many formal organizations that exist to create networking and education opportunities for those who run businesses to build friendships and share experiences.  Being around others who are tackling similar issues in their companies is a fast way to understanding the shared strains of leadership.  Enterpreneurs Organization (EO), Vistage, and Young Presidents Organization (YPO) are just a few examples.  Your local Chamber of Commerce or trade association will also know of other groups where you can participate.

The old adage, "All work and not play makes Jack a dull boy" is true for entrepreneurs.  Sometimes the excitement of the business can cause people to ignore everything else.  While there are no real days off when you are running a company, be proactive in carving out time for the people you love and the outside activities that re-charge your batteries.  This might require scheduling the time, but if you put it in your calendar, make it a priority and then keep true to the commitment.  The rush of working can be misleading and you need to invest the proper time in cultivating your relationships (including your relationship with yourself).

Nobody said being an entrepreneur was easy.  There is no overtime, sick days, vacations days, etc...  However, if you really love what you are doing, you do not care.

Have A Great Day

thom singer

What Makes You Different?

Wondering if people "think" enough about differentiation.

In our jobs we do stuff.  We accomplish things.  But are we contemplating and discovering what is really different in how we serve clients?  Are we unique from the competition or are we commodities in sheep's clothing?

Companies have great websites, brochures and other marketing materials, but they often look similar to the competition.  They think these tools make them stand out, but instead they look alike.  I did a poll with an audience of attorneys in Austin, Texas.  I instructed them to raise their hand if their firm website has an image of the local skyline, the State Capitol, or the scales of justice on the homepage.  Almost everyone's hand went up.  Once lady laughed out loud and proclaimed "Mine has all three!"

I was speaking to a group of bankers and I asked them "What differentiates you from other banks?".  Without hesitation these executives responded "We are a relationship bank".  They did not think for one minute, they knew the answer. The look in their eyes was classic when I then asked "Do your competitors tell prospects that they are NOT a relationships bank?  Do they announce they are just there to charge high fees?".  ALL BANKS SAY THEY ARE RELATIONSHIP FOCUSED.... thus that is not differentiation.  Instead it is a slogan.  A slogan does not necessarily mean anything.

These bankers and lawyers admitted they had never thought about how much they looked and sounded just like their competition.  It is easy to say claim the party line, it is hard to be different.  When everyone is claiming the same differentiation point, it is not a unique selling position.

Always be thinking about communicating what makes you different. This is not coming up with a slogan, but instead it has to be part of your daily thinking routine.  I fear most people do not "think" about things.  If you are always looking to discover ways to show what makes you different, you will stand out from the competition.

Here is an exercise to do with your co-workers:

1.  Ask "What makes us different from the competition?"

2.  Challenge the answer with "Can or does the competition say the same thing to prospective clients?"  and "Can the prospect tell see this difference before they buy?".

3.  Look for something else until you discover a real difference that makes a meaningful difference to a buyer (this may take more than one meeting...but if you do this exercise every day you will have an "A-Ha" moment).

Have A Great Day

thom singer

3 Things To-Do on the Last Day of a Conference

Attending a multi-day conference, trade show, convention or educational event can be a great way to give your career a boost. The ideas, information, best practices, exposure to new products or services, and the networking opportunities can all add up to un-matched inspiration and a renewed excitement to do your job.

However, when you get home and return to the regular routine, if you do not take action on implementing what your learned or connecting with the people you met, the ROI of attendance can quickly diminish.

Here are three things you can do on the last day of the event that will help you capitalize on the whole experience.

1.  Schedule appointments to follow up with people.  Meeting someone one time does NOT make them part of your network, and exchanging a business card or LinkedIn request does not mean that there is a real relationship going forward.  Seek out the three to five people you most enjoyed meeting and set up a time to connect by phone or Skype a few weeks after the conference.

Make sure there is a purpose to the conversation, not just a chance to "ping" someone.  If there is not a clear business purpose (you buy their product or service, etc...) a good idea is to tell them you respect their point of view and would like to talk for a "sharing de-brief" about the highlights of the conference.  Often two people find very different benefits from attending an event.  After a couple of weeks the top ideas are clear.  When you chat with another person about the most valuable tid-bits of information, you both can find powerful insights that were not clear while on site.

2.  Seek out the event organizers.  Meeting organizers and those who work for the host organization put in a lot of time, effort, planning, and energy into creating the amazing programs that took place at the event.  Very few people ever come up to them and say "Thank You".  It means a lot to them when sincere praise of the conference is shared verbally (not just on some electronic survey).  When you do this you will be noticed and remembered.

Getting on the radar of these organizers can often bring future opportunities to you or your company.  When they are seeking speakers or need other input for future events they will often reach out to those who they have met.  When there is a positive conversation it often leads to ongoing rapport.  Something as simple as telling them what you most enjoyed about their event could get you involved next time (and that brings you added visibility in your industry).

3.  Write a personal review of the event.  Doing this while waiting for your plane (or on the flight) is a great way to categorize all the best learning points and gives you a chance to make a list of the people you met. By committing your thoughts to paper it allows you to clearly grasp what aspects of your participation were the most valuable.

Once back at the office you can edit this review for public distribution and share the document with your boss and co-workers.  Not everyone in your organization was able to attend the event, but your synopsis of the highlights will bring them fresh ideas and maybe bring them some new motivation.  Additionally your report will remind the people you work with that you trip was not just an expensive boondoggle but a valuable work experience.

Have A Great Day.

thom singer

 Thom Singer is known as "The Conference Catalyst". He works with meeting planners and conference organizers to set the tone for a meeting. His presentations educate, inspire and motivate attendees to engage deeper in the event and make meaningful connections.  http://www.conferencecatalyst.com 

www.ConferenceCatalyst.com