40 Tips To Re-Invent and Re-Launch at Age 40, 50, or Beyond. (Tip #2)
If you want to change your life, surround yourself with people who are living the life you desire. Jim Rohn famously said "You are the sum of the five people you spend the most time with". Think about that and look around at how your peers choose to spend their time. It is your future.
Recently I was chatting by phone with an person who wants to have a career as a professional speaker. I asked her "How many speaker friends do you have?" She had no reply. After a few seconds she asked "Do you count?" (we were are not yet really "friends", as we just met). I am unclear how anyone can enter a new industry or lifestyle without knowing people who are living in that arena.
It can be difficult to make new friends as we get older. For Generation X or the Baby Boomers it might seem like they have all their friends in place for life. Yet people will come and go from your life at all stages if you are open to sharing your world with others, you can find the right people.
Early in life we have school, clubs, sports and other formal and informal activities that bring us together with new people. Relationships are forged through shared experiences, but in today's hyper busy world we tend to be isolated quite often. Thus to make new friends you must put in a serious effort.
To find create new connections you first must act like a friend. What do friends do? They care. They listen. They put the other person first. They make sacrifices. Etc.... In real life we often behave in opposite ways to those we do not know, thus making it even harder to get to create friendships.
It is like dating; all parties must be committed to moving it forward if you want anything lasting and meaningful to occur.
Join organizations, and get involved. If you can't find the right organization, start your own group. Try getting people together for coffee or drinks on a regular basis. It has never been easier to reach people with shared interests. But realize that meeting someone once does not make them part of your network. Meeting them once makes them somebody you have met once. There is a big difference between a single encounter and a long-term and mutually beneficial relationship. Be patient and work to understand the motivations and needs of others, in addition to your own.
Remember, not everyone you want to make part of your inner circle will want to be your friend. That is okay. There are plenty of great people in the world, and you can find the right tribe with effort and patience.
Additionally, there are times when friendships come to an end. While sad, it is not uncommon and should not create excess drama. You cannot make people be part of your world, so happily enjoy the memories and then surround yourself with the people who have come to share the next chapters of your life.
Have A Great Day
thom singer
Showing posts with label Generation X. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Generation X. Show all posts
Saturday, May 16, 2015
Friday, May 15, 2015
Don't Worry About What Others Think
40 Tips To Re-Invent and Re-Launch at Age 40, 50, or Beyond. (Tip #1)
As the members of "Generation X" hit the big 4-0 and big 5-0, the time has come for us to take charge of our lives. We were educated by the baby boomers and those who came before to expect a world that changed. The reality of today is different than what we went to school to learn. If we allow the expectations of others to hold us back from forging our own paths now, we may not get another chance.
Now is the mid-point of life for Gen X. This generation that was thought to be slackers are proving to be cunning entrepreneurs who make things happen. Those who are finding the most success are not worried about what others think, and instead are taking action.
Those of us in this generation that is sandwiched between the Boomers and Millennials do not get the same amount of press coverage as those on either side, but we don't care. We just do stuff and make things happen.
If you want to get a fresh start in your life or career at this middle age you cannot be worried about what other people think. Very often we place our identities in our our job titles or other outside labels that are assigned by those around us. You are a doctor, lawyer, husband, mother, etc.... Your past actions are what the world assumes your now is all about. But in our hearts many of us know we are ready to re-launch.
None of us are any one single thing, and if we want to make a change in our life in our 40s or 50s we cannot be hung up on conclusions that other people have jumped.
It is easy to get caught in a role that begins to feel like a ever deepening hole. We wonder if we are too old to do something new. If you are seeking a fresh start that gets you closer to your real self, then you cannot be stuck in your past.
Clearly your relationships with those closest to you matter as do their feelings. But outside your family and closest friends, why in the world should you care how outsiders judge you? We are being judged all the time and it does not matter one bit.
When I launched out on my own as a speaker many of my "friends" discussed how they thought I would fail in my quest. While I might have failed (happily I have not), the journey of trying was the important thing to me. I had longed to start my own business for many years, and if I had not done it at age 42, I am certain regret would have always been present.
Hearing what others thought about my goals, especially those who secretly gossiped negative opinions (oh yes, if you say something bad about another person, even in confidence, rest assured they will hear of your sharp tongue) could have derailed the whole thing and sent me looking for a regular job. But I did not care. The time had come to own my dream. My wife and kids were supportive, and that was all that mattered.
There will always be naysayers, and this stops many people from ever trying to go for a re-invention. The time is now for Generation X to drop any assumptions, labels, and limits. Today is about a fresh start.
Have A Great Day
thom singer
As the members of "Generation X" hit the big 4-0 and big 5-0, the time has come for us to take charge of our lives. We were educated by the baby boomers and those who came before to expect a world that changed. The reality of today is different than what we went to school to learn. If we allow the expectations of others to hold us back from forging our own paths now, we may not get another chance.
Now is the mid-point of life for Gen X. This generation that was thought to be slackers are proving to be cunning entrepreneurs who make things happen. Those who are finding the most success are not worried about what others think, and instead are taking action.
Those of us in this generation that is sandwiched between the Boomers and Millennials do not get the same amount of press coverage as those on either side, but we don't care. We just do stuff and make things happen.
If you want to get a fresh start in your life or career at this middle age you cannot be worried about what other people think. Very often we place our identities in our our job titles or other outside labels that are assigned by those around us. You are a doctor, lawyer, husband, mother, etc.... Your past actions are what the world assumes your now is all about. But in our hearts many of us know we are ready to re-launch.
None of us are any one single thing, and if we want to make a change in our life in our 40s or 50s we cannot be hung up on conclusions that other people have jumped.
It is easy to get caught in a role that begins to feel like a ever deepening hole. We wonder if we are too old to do something new. If you are seeking a fresh start that gets you closer to your real self, then you cannot be stuck in your past.
Clearly your relationships with those closest to you matter as do their feelings. But outside your family and closest friends, why in the world should you care how outsiders judge you? We are being judged all the time and it does not matter one bit.
When I launched out on my own as a speaker many of my "friends" discussed how they thought I would fail in my quest. While I might have failed (happily I have not), the journey of trying was the important thing to me. I had longed to start my own business for many years, and if I had not done it at age 42, I am certain regret would have always been present.
Hearing what others thought about my goals, especially those who secretly gossiped negative opinions (oh yes, if you say something bad about another person, even in confidence, rest assured they will hear of your sharp tongue) could have derailed the whole thing and sent me looking for a regular job. But I did not care. The time had come to own my dream. My wife and kids were supportive, and that was all that mattered.
There will always be naysayers, and this stops many people from ever trying to go for a re-invention. The time is now for Generation X to drop any assumptions, labels, and limits. Today is about a fresh start.
Have A Great Day
thom singer
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