My friend Leslie has a post on her blog about "Mean Women". She was counseling a friend who was dealing with difficult people in a philanthropic organization, but her point is not limited to women .... as men are equally guilty of doing jerky things business situations.
I enjoyed her conclusion that "Intentional Meanies were compensating for things in their lives they can't control: the actions of their own aging parents, their portfolios, the state of their marriages." There are people who feel the need to punish others for any variety of reasons... and they often do not even know that they are filled with this rage, as they justify that others are clearly the cause of all their problems (but those around them witness their constant finger pointing it in all sorts of situations... which probably makes this a never ending cycle for some people).
Minor disagreements get blown up because people fill in the blanks with conspiracies of how others might take advantage of them. They feel if they "go mean" they are protecting themselves. Of course they are also protected from future opportunities, as actions build reputations.
People get jealous of the success of others and often want to "knock them down a notch" and put them in their place. They gossip and try to bring others into their web of disdain. They compare themselves to others and cannot understand how the inferior could possibly have more success.
And there are countless other reasons people behave poorly. We can never know what others are thinking. Assumptions get us in trouble, as the way things appear on the outside rarely match the reality.
In the end, none of us can control the actions of others. It would be wonderful if everyone stood up to the "meanies", but most continue to get away with bad behavior. Best to take Leslie's advice and hold yourself to a higher standard and ignore the background noise.
Getting caught up in the weeds only brings you down.
What do you think?
Have A Great Day.
thom singer
Minor disagreements get blown up because people fill in the blanks with conspiracies of how others might take advantage of them. They feel if they "go mean" they are protecting themselves. Of course they are also protected from future opportunities, as actions build reputations.
People get jealous of the success of others and often want to "knock them down a notch" and put them in their place. They gossip and try to bring others into their web of disdain. They compare themselves to others and cannot understand how the inferior could possibly have more success.
And there are countless other reasons people behave poorly. We can never know what others are thinking. Assumptions get us in trouble, as the way things appear on the outside rarely match the reality.
In the end, none of us can control the actions of others. It would be wonderful if everyone stood up to the "meanies", but most continue to get away with bad behavior. Best to take Leslie's advice and hold yourself to a higher standard and ignore the background noise.
Getting caught up in the weeds only brings you down.
What do you think?
Have A Great Day.
thom singer
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